As a kid I was told to close all spaces leading in and out.
Close your legs
Close your mouth
Close your mind
Close your door
Don’t let anything in or out unless appropriate to do so. Failure to adhere will result in us having no choice but to show you the error of your ways using our most sophisticated technology: shame.
This strategy involves holding up what you mistakenly thought was valuable so that you can see it the way we see it, as not valuable at all.
We will not stop until shame has you crawl back inside the turtleneck of yourself so you can do the right thing for the team without being such a nuisance.
Being grounded so deep inside myself felt like a punishment so inhumane, that I began the art of escaping. Out the window, down the street, down the gullet, anyplace to avoid the cell of my insides all alone.
But after enough times running from such a dismal fate, I became too weary. Too dismayed. And so I waved the white flag. “Fine,” I said. “I give up. You win. I’m staying down here.”
But once I gave up escaping, and settled deep down inside myself, I heard a funny voice. “Welcome,” it chuckled. “Have a seat. You’re a busy one. We didn’t expect you’d ever stay long enough for tea.”
“Well, the world grounded me,” I explained. “Sent me here as punishment. And I’ve finally accepted my punishment.”
The voice laughed. “Cretins. They’re like the worst kind of furniture. They know nothing beyond functionality. Let me tell you something: Who you are is impossible to punish. And even more impossible to contain. In their unknowing, they sent you to a world larger than any continent, with depths too deep to fully delve.
There are beings here who have traveled through your blood from the earliest beginnings. And we are your comrades. Your sisters and brothers on the other side.
And be assured, there is nothing here to be ashamed of. Only your thoughts, ideas and dreams, the longing to share them, and the memories of all your attempts to do so.
But you mustn’t give up. It’s your purpose to share these things. In fact, they’re the only ingredients in existence that can create the relationships and the circumstances that match who it is you are for yourself.
When you allow shame to keep yourself to yourself, you do everyone a disservice. You allow yourself to be who others expect you to be, whether it represents your true self or not.
But when you emerge from your depths as who you are down in here, it is an invitation for others to do the same.
And those pieces of furniture who are always trying to contain everything so that it’s easy enough to fit in their pocket—have no idea of any journey other than the one they take to deposit what they’ve pocketed directly into their savings account.
They won’t acknowledge any other journey unless it’s bound or notarized or promises an eternity with all the stuff they worked so hard to secure.
But have no doubt: Your journey is yours. And your task is to learn the ancient art of believing that your magic is real. Not hocus-pocus magic, but the magic of a seed’s journey to blossom.
And once you believe in your magic, and you realize it’s your right to open up and share the fruits of who you’ve become, you will do so—and you will paw the earth with your magic between your teeth and a glint in your eye, and you will drop it at the feet of the furniture on the other side, who will recline in their easy chairs and laugh.
And they’ll reach down to pick it up, and they’ll look at it in their particular way, so that its majesty immediately turns flaccid, and they’ll laugh. ‘Must we remind you what happens when you don’t see things they way we see things?’ And you’ll be tempted to turtleneck back down into your punishment.
But fear not—you will know now that there is no punishment here. They don’t know these lands, my friend. These lands are where the punished go. And those who punish are not welcome. They’ll never realize that through these cracks is where the flowers bloom.
They don’t understand that if you visit here enough times, these blossoms grow wilder and wilder and they begin to find their way through the cracks and out into the world where they spiral over and under and past those who shamed you, and out into the rest of the world, until these pieces of furniture are no longer able to deny the value of your ingredients…
And finally, instead of trying to shame you back home inside yourself, these pieces of furniture will ask for a bouquet… just something modest enough to set upon their mantel. And you will gladly oblige, because really, inadvertently, it was they who led you to this most wonderful place there is.
From our depths we share a common space that’s beyond the politics of shame, where we can blossom together till our gardens are no longer contained, but joined as one, so that we can celebrate the magic of our growth and water our seeds together.
-JLK
