The Land Of I’m Better Than You

When he walked down the street, all you could hear
was, “I’m better than you,” in everyone’s ear.

He screamed it to dogs while he ran through the park,
and he screamed it to grown-ups awake in the dark.

He screamed it to mail people six times a week,
and he screamed it some more if they dared try to speak.

He yelled it at classmates busy at play,
and retold his sister every day.

He said it to clouds and when it was clearer,
and once even said it out loud in the mirror!

He tried it real low and he tried it much higher,
and once even bellowed the words in the choir.

He told it one morning to a sweet girl named Mandy,
when she asked if he wanted a sweet piece of candy.

He hummed it in hallways and out on the street.
He told it to vegetables, even to meat.

As weeks turned to months and the months to a year,
the whole town had grown used to his busy career.

And when folks saw him coming, they all ran away.
“Yeah, you’re better than me. We all heard you, OK?”

The boy felt content. His job was now done.
He was better than everyone, every last one.

So he went to his bedroom and sat all alone,
then got an idea and picked up the phone.

He dialed some numbers and waited while it rang,
and as soon as someone answered, you know what he sang.

“You’re not better than me,” a voice said with a roar.
“Yes, I sure am,” said the boy, turning sore.

“Is this how you’re spending a beautiful day?
Scaring innocent people away?

I bet you don’t have many friends, now, do you?”
“How did you know?” “I can see right through you . . .

See, life’s not a contest. It’s about having fun,
and celebrating the specialness of everyone!”

The boy felt an ache and he started to cry.
“But I’m not special. No matter how hard I try.

Nobody sees me till I tell them I’m better.”
“Well, it’s more fun when people feel special together.”

“But nobody likes me. And no one ever did.”
“If you try to be likable, you’ll be likable, kid.”

So, the next day, the boy gave a speech to the town.
“I want to apologize. I let you all down.

I know that I’m not really better than you.
I just felt ignored by the fun things you do.

But I promise I won’t ever say it again.
I just wanted somebody to want to be my friend.”

As the boy stepped off his podium and headed back home,
another boy ran after him and hollered with a groan:

“Do you have time to play? I just got this new ball.”
The boy looked shocked, but smiled, in awe.

And the two boys played ball amidst sunshine and laughter,
which was really all the little boy had ever been after.

-JLK

All episodes written, performed and produced by Jessica Laurel Kane, and the music was made by Jerome Rossen at Freshmade Music.