In our formative years, if everything we do is constantly shamed, ridiculed and discouraged, a pathway can get created in our minds. Even if no one’s watching what we do, we may still wind up on this same pathway, paved with all these same messages—that what we do and who we are is deeply flawed and not worthy of being adored and loved and nurtured.
Over time, because this path gets so worn, it can be easy to imagine it’s the only reliable path. Because no matter how hard we try, we always wind up taking it. But this is only because we don’t have any other reliable pathway.
Creating a new pathway can be difficult, especially if we’re still in environments devoid of loving encouragement. So what we need to do is excavate a new pathway from scratch. A pathway designed to encourage the person we still know ourselves to be deep inside. A pathway that will take us where we want to go.
And once we have the beginnings of a path, we need to keep traveling on it. No matter how rocky the path is, and no matter what difficulties may arise, we must get back on our self-created path as soon as possible.
And in time, this new path will get worn, and walking on it will get easier. And we may even forget about that old pathway, because it'll get
harder to find, and we’ll remember that where it takes us is no longer where we need to go.
-JLK
